Lazarus House had a profoundly positive effect on me and are responsible for my new life. In order to convey the gravity of the impact that Lazarus House has had on my life, you should know who I am, and what led me here.
I am a mother, a daughter, a niece, a cousin, and a friend to many wonderful people. I am well educated. I am kind, I am strong, I am responsible, I have a moral compass, and I have never been in trouble with the law. I have never done drugs, nor do I drink alcohol. I am a survivor. I grew up in a home with two parents, my father and my stepmother. My home growing up was a beautiful four bedroom, three bathroom in the suburbs with a huge backyard and a safe neighborhood. I attended great schools and tested at 12th grade plus (college level) every year since 3rd grade. I was in the challenge program for gifted students. I excelled at reading and science. I earned straight A’s my entire school career.
Sounds great on paper doesn’t it! What you would never guess from those facts is that school was my escape. It allowed me a place to shine, excel, and be myself. People were kind, happy, and caring, and celebrated my achievements. School had everything I was lacking in my home life. From the age of six when my father married my stepmother, I was abused verbally, physically, and mentally on an hourly and daily basis. As soon as my dad left for work, I was beaten even worse, than the time before for telling. Yes, I told my father but my step mom insisted I was lying for attention. He believed her.
I was not allowed out to play with friends from school. I was not allowed to participate in sports, or have any after school activities. Eventually I stopped telling and accepted it as a part of my life. I finally ended up confiding in my dad’s sister on my 16th birthday, which became the day the abuse ended because I immediately left with her to live in her home.
Freedom felt so liberating! I was finally able to breathe and begin experiencing life on my own terms. What I did not realize is that I had no idea how to function without being told how to act, dress, talk or feel. It took the remainder of my teen years, and most of my twenties to trust others, build meaningful relationships, focus on who I was as a person, and decide my morals and values.
I began a successful career, started a family of my own and finally started living instead of just existing. Jumping into life without initiating therapy to heal from my childhood, and not knowing any better, I chose a life partner that was similar to my father. That is what led me to become homeless. I trusted my partner with the finances, my paychecks, and the business we began together. I lost everything when he decided to leave the kids and me for another woman.
I contacted Lazarus House out of desperation where I was welcomed into the Emergency Shelter. One thing that stood out to me from my experience there is, I was always greeted cheerfully, and engaged in conversations that made me feel like a human being instead of ashamed for being homeless. The staff was uplifting, kind, supportive and their happiness was contagious. That may not seem like much, but to me, it was brightness I needed during this dark time in my life.
I was able to move from the Emergency Shelter into the Center for Transitional Living program at Lazarus House. I ended up leaving before I completed it, a decision I would live to regret, because I was not financially stable enough, and became a guest of Lazarus House again in February 2021, in the height of the pandemic. I had lost my home, and was living in a hotel. I had a job and a car, little savings, and no other option than to send my children to their fathers, and contact Lazarus House for shelter.
While there, with the support of my case manager, I quickly upgraded jobs. I set goals and reached them all. It was not easy, I almost gave up but none of the staff gave up on me and they motivated me to keep plugging along. They all shared words of encouragement, advice and motivation. They gave me grace when I needed it. They believed in me. They supported me in every way I needed, and in ways, I did not even realize I needed at the time.
Each staff member goes above, and beyond to enhance the environment and our lives as guests. There are house meetings to help us communicate more effectively and live together in harmony. I received guidance and direction on anything job/career related. They listened about my days, celebrated my successes excitedly and proudly, always greeted me by my name, and always had a kind word. They treat us with dignity and teach us skills we may need to strengthen.
I now have a great job at a church, a new home, and I have my children back under the same roof reunited as a family again. I become integrated back in the community. I am attending therapy with the same therapist I started with 5 years ago that Lazarus House referred to me. I am full of self-confidence.
I also would like you to know in my lifetime thus far, I personally passed a law in the State of IL. I had to find a sponsor and testify in front of the Senate and House of Representatives. My bill passed unanimously through both House and Senate, and signed into law by the Governor. I won the Environmental Hero of the Year award from the State of IL. I have talented beautiful children who are turning into amazing humans and young adults. I have made a difference in the lives of many. The reason I am telling you all of this to say I am a good person surrounded by great people and homelessness still affected my life. It does not discriminate. It can happen to anyone. I could be your sister, cousin, neighbor, co-worker, or your friend.
Lazarus House has helped me and influenced my family positively beyond measure. All of your work is invaluable that will leave a lasting legacy on this community.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the lifelong gifts you’ve all given to me by sharing your time and resources.
